Cpl. Henry Jacobson grew up three miles north of Onalaska, near Beck Road. He died from injuries sustained in the Battle of Argonne Forest near the end of World War I.
Memorial Day found our family visiting my late father-in-law at Alpha Cemetery. It’s a tradition to take three generations out to his burial site to clean his grave and those of his family there.
We also strolled through the well-kept cemetery, reading the gravestones nearby.
We noticed a large granite stone for Cpl. Henry A. Jacobson, who died on Oct. 26, 1918.
“Look at this,” I told my children. “He died in World War I, just two weeks before the end of the war.”
He was 22 years old.
My oldest son spent a few minutes cleaning Cpl. Jacobson’s gravestone as we talked about the Armistice and the “War to End All Wars.” (“It didn’t end all wars, did it Dad,” my son remarked.)
In many cases, a stone is all that most of us know about the people who preceded us in this land.
Fortunately, there’s more to know about this son of Lewis County who fought and died “over there.”
My friend, the historian and author Victor Kucera, has uncovered the story of Cpl. Jacobson and four other sons of Alpha and the nearby town of Onalaska who were casualties of World War I.
In his highly readable history book, “Onalaska,” Kucera tells us that Jacobson had enlisted in the army the year before. After training, he shipped out across the Atlantic in June of 1918.
Three months after arriving in France, he was advancing in “no man’s land” between opposing trenches during the Battle of Argonne Forest. He was severely wounded.
That battle, Kucera notes, was pivotal in the war, helping break the German will to fight, but it led to heavy American losses.
Jacobson was sent to a French hospital, and during his month-long stay he wrote a letter to his parents, telling them he expected to be ready for military service again soon.
The war ended on Nov. 11, 1918, and the people of Alpha, Lewis County and all of America celebrated that their boys would be coming home soon.
News of individual soldiers was slower to arrive. In mid-November, Jacobson’s parents learned that their son had been injured. Two weeks later, they learned that he had already died a month before.
Similar news trickled in of three more soldiers from the Onalaska and Alpha area. Another man suffered severe injuries from poison gas used during the war. He died of those injuries a few years later,
Jacobson’s heartbroken parents buried him in the Alpha Cemetery, where his gravestone stands 101 years later as a reminder of the lives and deaths of those who served to the death when their nation called them.
Raising the Next Generation
Taking our kids out on Memorial Day to practice showing respect for their ancestors is one way we try to teach them how to live good, meaningful lives in this world.
As parents, it’s our most important job.
Several years ago, my wife and I took a parenting class at our church, and found it very helpful.
The class used a book called “Confident Parenting” that included a concept called AWE — Affection, Warmth and Encouragement. The idea really transformed my interactions with our kids.
I began looking for opportunities, small and large, to meaningfully and specifically show warmth and appreciation to them, giving them a hug and feedback on what they’re doing right. It allows you to form deeper daily bonds that endure, while also giving positive feedback to help encourage growth of good traits they’re beginning to show.
It also forms a great counterbalance to the other inevitable moments of correction. I had felt like all my kids heard from me was disapproval — fortunately, a focus on AWE helps tilt the balance, so that when I engage with them, they have had so much authentic positivity from me, that they don’t automatically think my words will be something negative.
The second idea that I really liked from this book is the idea of setting a long-term goal for what you want the outcome of your parenting to be. What kind of kid do you want to raise? I’m not talking about raising them to be a doctor or sports player or whatnot. I’m talking about rearing children who can be lights in a dark world.
Often that requires recalibration as we fill our lives with all the events and activities that we think our kids “need.” Sports, music, excursions, screens, etc. — all might have their place, but so do dinners together at home or a quiet day of rest. This book describes the idea of “turning down” some aspects of life so we can “turn up” other things that will be important long-term.
My wife and I enquired at our church about having this class run again. As with many things in life, the suggestion was turned back to us with a, “sounds good — will you facilitate it?”
And so, starting this Sunday morning, we’ll be helped bring together parents who want to do their best in this most-important job. All are welcome to join us. The class is free, running each Sunday through the month of June at Bethel Church, Chehalis (just off exit 72.) Come for one session, some of them, or all.
We can’t promise all the answers, but you will definitely be greeted with affection, warmth and encouragement — and let me tell you, that feels as good to give as it does to receive.
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Brian Mittge’s column appears most Saturdays. Contact him at brianmittge@hotmail.com.
